Inviting the Mystic, Supporting the Prophet: book reflection

Initially I was intrigued by the title of this book written by Katherine Marie Bykman & Patrick Carroll. It caught my curiosity. As I read the foreword and introduction, I felt drawn to the authors’ thesis as it was something I wholeheartedly agreed with: the tests of authentic prayer are in the fruit of the praying life or the community. I was interested in the relationship between prayer and service, mystic and prophet. 

I was not disappointed as the authors describe the symbiotic relationship between the mystic and the prophet in the believer’s life. “The starting point is not as important as that the circle be complete: prayer leading to life, and life leading to prayer. Real prayer leads to involvement; real involvement leads to prayer. Deeper spirituality impels to action; action impels to deeper spirituality, and the circle continues and deepens. The mystic becomes prophet, the prophet becomes mystic” (Dykman & Carrol, 80).  I used to believe that every plan or service should spring from prayer, but now I am willing to concede that for some people, action came first, and I should not disparage some “prayerless” action, but guide such active persons to seek God in prayer more.

I like the authors’ description of spiritual direction. It is not narrowly confined to the guided development of the directees’ prayer life, but a journey with them in their larger faith development, which includes conversion, struggle, integration, awareness of reality and a call to radical love, not just the prayer life.  The call to radical love would include immersion in works of service, justice and compassion. “All these holy people are holy not just because they pray or write eloquently about that prayer, but because their prayer leads them to respond to Christ in the given historical cultural moment. All of them respond in a unique way to unique situations in which they find the Lord calling to his people. But all respond outside themselves in service. Each mystic becomes a prophet”(Dykman & Carrol, 82). This reminded me how this emphasis on mission and service is so similar to Ignatian prayer spirituality.

The chapter on PRAYING THROUGH THE DESERT is particularly enlightening for me. The authors gave two descriptions of the desert experience in prayer: one from St John of the Cross of the 16th Century mystic and poet, and another through Thomas Merton a 20th Century mystic and poet. I found both helpful and complementary. The advice to spiritual directors leading others through the desert experience is to help the directee look at his or her larger or entire life. “We cannot judge our prayer, whether it be consoling or desolate, by how we feel when we pray, but rather by how we are loving when we live” (62). A person’s prayer life may be desert-like but an examen of his life may reveal God’s loving activities and presence in many areas of his life of service. This helps him see that God’s love is as strong as ever and that the desert may be God’s way of moving on the purification of his faith in and love for God and not the result of his sin.

I enjoyed this book and found myself underlining many sentences and paragraphs. These definitely deserve further reflection and discussion with the Lord. 

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Silent Retreat: Spiritual Direction Formation Program

“A five full days silent retreat”, this was what Sister Fran emphasized to us. She is the leader fronting this program of Life Direction Singapore. We checked in at 4pm a day earlier on Monday to settle in and began our first session at 8pm. After that session, grand silence began and continued till the wrap-up session on Sunday morning at 10.30am, following which, the silence ended. It was an individually directed retreat, as each retreatant had a spiritual director whom they met with for about thirty to forty-five minutes each day.

As a friend

During the opening session, we were asked to write the grace or blessing we wanted to receive from the Lord during the retreat. I wrote that I wanted “friendship with Jesus”. I wanted to spend the week like a vacation with Jesus as my friend. I recalled the verse in Exodus 33:11, “The Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as one speaks to a friend”. I longed to keep company with the Lord. 

In my first session with my spiritual director, Soo Hoong, a ministry staff from Paya Lebar Methodist Church, I shared with her the grace I asked for: friendship with God. She asked me to think of this retreat as being with a friend for a week. I could discuss with the Lord what we could do together, or vice versa. I could also share what is on my heart or ask the Lord what was on his heart, like, “How do you see me?” In the sessions that followed she would prompt me with other suggestions of how this divine friendship could be nurtured and find expression during the retreat.

I asked the Lord a few times, “How do you see me?” The answer was to come two days later through an image that came to me of an infant child. Straight away I was reminded of a Psalm that I meditated upon years ago about a weaned child. I searched and found Psalm 131: 2: “Instead I have calmed and quieted myself, like a weaned child, who no longer cries for its mothers milk. Yes, like a weaned child is my soul within me”. It dawned on me that my faith used to be immature, like a baby demanding, upset and controlling, wanting my needs and expectations met my way and in my time. Otherwise, I would cry in anxiety and turmoil. My faith has since become a calm and quiet trust in God during troubles and trials, matured and willing to wait patiently for God. I was pleased that that was how the Lord viewed me. Any mother would tell you how relieved and pleased they would feel when a child has moved on from mother’s milk on demand, to being totally weaned to a calm and quiet patience.  I was happy that He was pleased with my growth.

During the retreat, I seem to be gifted with a garment of praise. My heart was bubbling with joy and I was praising God often. I often sang worship choruses, hummed a melody or sang in tongues. I did it in my room, while walking the labyrinth or the rail corridor. It was a relaxed, praise-filled, and joyful retreat.

Using the labyrinth

There are two labyrinths at Montfort Centre and they can be used in different ways. I walked the labyrinth before breakfast, or at sunset or at night, because these were the times it was not hot. I sometimes walked the labyrinth to converse or discuss a matter with the Lord, as I would with a friend on a hike. Other times, I walked it to express praise and adoration, and to sing in the Spirit, or to hum a hymn. Significantly, I once used the Jesus Prayer: “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me” and had a touch from the Lord, a grace moment, when I felt contrition and confessed my pride, and acknowledged that I am but a graced person, who earned nothing, did not deserve anything, but that all had been given to me, all is gift. 

One beautiful day with fair weather, I walked the rail corridor from Railway Mall to the newly done-up Bukit Timah Railway Station. It was a pleasant saunter with the Lord, taking in the sights and taking the occasional photograph. When I reached the Station, I simply sat and rested for a while, looking around at people taking photographs in empty carriages along old railway tracks preserved for ours and later generations to appreciate our history with Malaysia. There was a lovely café, but I was not prepared to pay $5.50 for a cappuccino. I did not walk back but took the train back from King Albert Park MRT station to Cashew. 

Paint your feelings

The organizers had art materials available for any retreatant to use. Though not trained in art, I felt the urge to take some water colour paint and brushes to express my heart and I noticed that the colours and images I painted expressed my feelings appropriately. They were bright colours, intimate and celebratory images, and point to the joy, intimacy and gratitude I felt. They kind of summed up this retreat for me. Though it was part of the “course requirement”, it was very much a formational experience for me. 

If you are interested to know why silence is important in prayer, click HERE.

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Revival of 1972: A Landmark Video

This documentary done by Salt & Light is surely a landmark in Singapore’s Christian media history. We have had books about the history of the Singapore church (“In His Good Time” by Bobby Sng), and about the charismatic revival of the 1970’s (“Unfolding His Story” by Galven and Georgie Lee ), but this is the first time a significant full-length documentary has been launched by Salt & Light a Christian media company. It comprised mainly current interviews, old photos and film footage of witnesses and participants of the revival of 1972. 

I can imagine the challenge it presented to the media team, sourcing and collating all the old photos and rounding up revival witnesses and filming all the interviews. The amount of man hours and talent involved is huge. I first received a WhatsApp message from Thomas Franks introducing himself on 6 February 2022, and he probably had started the ball rolling even earlier. 

If the revival took place in 2022, there will be no lack of videos, social media traces, lots of Instagram pictures and Tik Tok and YouTube videos of the revival. In fact, it will be in excess – a huge video editing migraine! But it happened 50 years ago, when most of us do not own a camera. So lots of archaeological digs! Besides the initial meeting, when Thomas Franks the video producer, noted down facts and opinions, there were many occasions of clarifications about events, facts and photo sourcing. Then there is the script to write and the interviews to do. Monumental task.

The video team came to World Revival Prayer Fellowship (WRPF) an hour earlier than the appointed time to set up their equipment, and they did about two hours of filming on a few cameras, for the two interviews about the revival in Dunearn Secondary Technical School, which then grew into WRPF. By the time they finished work, it was close to 4.30pm. It took a whole day for the media team, and these were only the raw files, which then had to be sifted and edited, to fit with the storyline and script. And ours was only one side story among many side stories. 

I was glad to be part of the project, and to see myself talking in the video and contributing to the story of the revival of 1972, gave me a sense of satisfaction. The revival story was richly multi-faceted and yet there is a unity about it and this is clearly reflected in the video. You can see and hear me at the 8.15/8.30 minutes time stamp.

May this video stir a hunger among generation next to seek a new move of God for their time. It won’t be the same kind because God is not stuck in the past and his wisdom and creativity is greater than our forecasting capacity. Eyes have not seen and ears have not heard what God has prepared for those who love him.

If you were a participant of the revival of 1972 that went on for close to a decade, please feel free to tell us your story in the comment box. Thank you.

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St John’s Chapel: a missional family church

It was early Sunday morning at St John’s Chapel, and I was warmly welcomed by Revd Tang Wai Lung, the experienced priest who was newly appointed to lead the English congregation. He showed me around the lovely church sanctuary with parquet flooring and three-pointed arches that led your gaze upward to God. He showed me a set of four plaques that was preserved from their old church building in Jurong. He informed me that St John’s Chapel was originally a church plant initiated by Revd William Gomes and Mr Cheok Loi Fatt to reach out to farmers and villagers in Jurong in 1872.  By 1884, a church building was erected and a congregation established. The church was missional right from its birth. Thankfully, true to its DNA, St John’s Chapel has remained a strongly missional church that encourages all members young and old to sign up and embark on mission trips every other year. When the government took over the Jurong building for redevelopment, St John’s Chapel moved to St Margaret’s Secondary School, and has been there since.

Two pleasant surprises

I had two pleasant surprises before the service began. I met an old friend, Boon Sing, whom I knew from the Christian fellowship in Mindef, while doing my National Service. I recalled how we memorized verses and prayed together. The second surprise was that he was in the traditional choir of the church and they sang a lovely “Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus”. Why did the song at the prelude and this song moved me? The Lord was reminding me of his presence in the meeting.

Preaching the good news

I was asked to preach a gospel message and I had only one thus far and I have preached this five times before. I still had to sit before the Lord in prayer, hovering over the script, and making minor modifications and improvements. It took time for me to warm up to the new faces in front of me, but as I proceeded, the delivery of the message got better and better. I was glad that people responded to the invitation to pray in the front, for all the kneelers in front of the stage were occupied. A period of prayer ensued and I prayed that these precious seekers of God would be rewarded with real answers to their prayers. While I have been praying for souls to be saved through my preaching, there was no response to my invitation to non-Christians present to follow Jesus. Strangely, I was not discouraged about this. I trust God to anoint his word and let it germinate in its time. 

A missional and family church

After the service, I had refreshments at the school canteen with the priest Revd Wai Lung, and Canon Barry Leong, the acting vicar, and my old friend Boon Sing. I found it amazing that Barry had to oversee three churches in the past, and is currently overseeing two churches for the time being. He said the secret to doing this is to have the right people in place and to trust them. After he left to go to attend the service of the other church he was overseeing, I continued to chat with Wai Lung and we talked about the Revival of 1972, different church polities, the culture of St John’s Chapel and other Anglican churches. He told me besides its missions emphasis, St John’s was a family church, a close knit caring community, which gives deliberate intention to include all generations into its activities, whether it be games, church retreats, or ministry. I thought these qualities are wonderful strengths for smaller churches to have. My observation is that the quality of community closeness fades as the congregational size enlarges. So this is the strength that small churches can cultivate and leverage, and be different from big churches.

Well, this was a visit and ministry I enjoyed. Taking on speaking engagements while you are still pastoring, is different from doing them after you have retired. With retirement, you are well rested, you have more time and space for God to move your heart and prepare yourself, and you are able to preach with more energy, restfulness and grace.

If you are interested to know more about this church and its services, you may visit their website HERE. Other churches where I have guest preached in or visited can be read about HERE.

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Only Asian in Top Pastors Blog Lists

I was pleasantly surprised to see my blog appear in two lists of Pastor Blogs. One is the “80 Best Pastor Blogs and Websites” (Feedspot). It is listed at number 27 but not according to any rank.  The other appears at number 12 in the “53 Top Pastor Blog to Follow in 2021” (eztoolset.com). In both lists I am the only Asian blogger.

These lists were done up for RSS feed readers. The platform makes it convenient for readers to follow blogs. They list down websites about certain subjects that have a record of good traffic, comments and other indications of engagement. This method of regularly and conveniently reading blogs is nowadays less popular than during the height of the popularity of blogs. I used to follow other blogs in an RSS feed reader but not anymore. 

Anyway, any form of acknowledgment is an encouragement to carry on doing what I have been doing since 2004. It was my son Joshua who goaded me into blogging with the intention of reaching out to young people. I started with Xanga.com, a now defunct platform. Then a few months later I moved to this website with the help of Vee San (design and problem solving) and an anonymous guy who provides free hosting. I have been using this website ever since. I was pleased to have been cited by Asian Wall Street Journal, Straits Times and The New Paper and other publications. All this can only be the Lord’s favour for I do not really provide informative nor substantial pieces of work.

I wrote for people and as a record for future generations and my family. I wrote authentic personal pieces about myself and my interests like trekking, football and other sports. I wrote about my observations of church life and culture in Singapore. I wrote about pastoral work, spirituality and prayer. I avoided controversial subjects as I find I do not have the intellectual depth to analyze and argue for a particular position. I do not discuss theological-exegetical matters as I find myself in rather shallow waters when I try to do that without a working knowledge of Hebrew or Greek. I wrote more about my observations, experiences, opinions and keep my posts short and deliberately incomplete or open-ended so that readers can make their comments and a healthy conversation may ensue. Things have changed though, and people rarely comment nowadays, no matter what I do. They do not want a discussion, they want to be entertained, and their attention span has shortened to Tik Tok limits.

Anyway, I still feel a compulsion to write, in obedience to the Lord. I have books in mind but they are sort of deposited here in this blog in tiny instalments which I hope one day to stitch together and edit into ebooks. Please pray for me to do this well and in good time.

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