Final Retreat of Spiritual Direction Formation Program

There were three retreats in the whole 21 months program. The learning is very experiential. They began with a short retreat with input, followed by a longer silent retreat with spiritual direction, and now this is the longest of the three, eight days of directed silent retreat, with half day to begin in prayer and another to seal the fruits of the retreat.

This is held at St Patrick’s School at East Coast Road. La Salle House is the name of the center, formerly a boy’s hostel. Its newly renovated and it looks good, and is comfortable. However, there were insufficient rooms, so all the men stayed in rooms at where the La Salle brothers live. The rooms are old, real old but old has its modest charms (see room floor tiles below). However, you can walk out across Marine Parade Road and the AYE highway, and you are at East Coast Park with ample places for meditation and prayer (see below)

This blog will be static until the retreat is over and hopefully I have a desire to write about this retreat. Until then, the Lord bless and keep you.

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What is Spiritual Direction?

This beautiful image with a magnet for the refrigerator was given by Teresa Hogan, a friend from the faith sharing group I am in. She bought it from the famous Myeongdong Cathedral in Seoul, Korea. When I beheld the 4cm square print of a painting (see above), it straightaway struck me as a beautiful image of what spiritual direction is all about. 

Spiritual direction is about accompanying someone on a journey. Although the picture is actually one of a couple on a journey, it can be anyone. I liked the idea of the spiritual director carrying a staff with a cross at the top, a symbol of our dependence on Christ’s finished work during our spiritual journey. The small sail boat at the harbour reminds us that the journey we take away from the safety of home, may be marked by strong winds and massive waves at some point, and having a companion on this journey of life is vital. Most blessed of all is to have the nurturing and caring Spirit watching with love over our going out and coming in (Psalm 121) and this is pictured in the white overarching cloud in the picture. 

I decided not to stick this to the fridge. I will keep it and place it at my desk to remind me what this ministry is all about. But what exactly is Spiritual Direction? Let me give you some of the descriptions that was given to us during one of the lessons in the Spiritual Direction Formation Program I am attending.

“An interpersonal relationship in which one person assists others to reflect on their own experience in the light of what they are called to become in fidelity to the Gospel” (Carroll & Dyckman).

“Spiritual direction, as we understand it then, is directly concerned with a person’s actual experiences of his relationship with God …. religious experience is to spiritual direction what foodstuff is to cooking. Without religious experience there can be no spiritual direction. 

We define spiritual direction, then, as help given by one Christian to another which enables that person to pay attention to God’s personal communication to him or her, to respond to this personally communicating God, to grow in intimacy with this God, and to live out the consequences of the relationship. The focus of this type of spiritual direction is on experience, not ideas, and specifically on religious experience, that is, any experience of the mysterious Other whom we call God. Moreover this experience is viewed, not as an isolated event, but as an expression of the ongoing personal relationship God has established with each one of us”. (Barry & Connolly S.J.)

A spiritual director made this observation in one supervisory session: ‘Spiritual direction is like panning for gold. A directee comes and together we dip into the stream of their life and pull up all kinds of things. Rocks of all sizes – I can never guess what is coming next – all kinds of conflicts and problems, then all of a sudden some fleck or nugget of pure gold emerges into view in the bottom of the pan as we swirl the water around, emptying out the rocks.’ This is a powerful and captivating metaphor of the process of spiritual direction. Together, the director and directee look at everything – whatever is in the water and the pan – during their session. The director receives the directee’s life and everything in that life, helping the directee contemplate the gold among all the conflicts and block and stuck places. A skillful, graced director gives that gold reverence, time, interest, and attention until the directee realizes how much more valuable and significant are the flecks of gold – the experiences of grace and the Spirit – then are all the stuck or problematic areas of his or her life.” (Ruffing RSM)

“Spiritual direction seeks primarily to enable the seeker to achieve a deep relationship or grounding in God and thus to live a life of total freedom, individuality and deep love. This is an awesome and complex process which entails ridding oneself of past psychological injuries and traumas, false ways of thinking and acting, and undue attachment to any person, possession, or spiritual practice. At the same time it encourages and fosters a practice of deep prayer so that one can discover ones’ deepest self, and thereby find the will of God in one’s life.” (Alice McDowell)

If you are looking for spiritual direction, Life Direction Singapore , an ecumenical group that has a list of available trained spiritual directors of Catholic or Protestant backgrounds.

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Spiritual Direction Formation Program: The Practicum Phase

It has been a year and I am in semester three of my spiritual direction formation program. I have observed that formation always took priority over information. This is good. This is the way it should be. We learn to listen to God, to listen to one another, and listen to movements in our soul. This growth does not come by more information, but by more formation: awareness and discernment through personal reflection, through spiritual direction with a spiritual director, and through faith sharing in groups.

After three rounds of giving direction to one another in-house, we now enter the phase of spiritual direction practicum. Each us have to find two directees to give spiritual direction to under an experienced supervisor. I feel excited about this phase, and look forward to learning more about spiritual accompaniment. The formators are very serious about the formation of spiritual directors, and want to ensure that even during this phase the volunteer directees will benefit from their sessions.

On Saturday, we had a Day of Prayer at the Franciscan Missionaries of Mary retreat house opposite the Botanic Gardens at 49 Holland Road. In each semester, a few days are devoted to such retreat days or week. We learn to be aware of what God is doing in our life and to respond to his invitations. 

For the first half of the day, we were instructed to reflect on the past year and to observe movements, encounters, people, blessings and joys, struggles and burdens, doubts and certitude, passion or aridity, hope and longing. As I reflected on the past year I gave thanks for the excitement and joy of observing the personal and spiritual growth in my formation. The highlights of my year were mostly related to the formation program.  

Lunch was fulsome: bento sets, beverages, banana cake, chocolates, and grapes. All was eaten in silence. We were to savour the fullness and richness of this blessing. I was so satiated I found myself wishing for a nap. 

The afternoon reflection was thankfully more tangible, since we had a heavy meal. We each took prayer shawls of different colours, cuttings and patterns. The long prayer shawl of the Jews is called “tallit/tallith”). “Tal” means tent. “ith” means little. Thus, with the shawl over our heads we set up a little tent, and invite God into our home, and we fellowship with Him in private prayer. The four fringes of the shawl are called “tzitzit” and comes from the Hebrew word “tzutz” which means “to gaze”. What a beautiful description of what should happen in prayer. With this “tent” we were instructed to meditate on the uncertainty of the journey ahead of us, similar perhaps to the twists, turns and movements of Joseph and Mary, accompanied by the holy infant Jesus. I have no certitude of what the future holds, but with God’s presence, I feel very assured and rested that like Joseph, who was entrusted with Jesus, I would experience the provision and providence of God.

At the end of the day of prayer, it was announced that we will get a confirmation via email of who we are giving direction to and what we need to do. I look forward to this new movement.

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God’s Life Finds A Way

Along the side of the pavement at Chinese Garden MRT I saw this slope of tiles leading to the grated drain. Along its joints and grout I saw fine and green grasses sprouting out towards the sky. It caught my attention for a while and I stood there to wonder what the Lord has for me there. Nothing came to mind. I then took a picture of it with the intention of going back to ponder over it. God speaks to us through so many ways and one of them is through what we see.

A week or two later, I looked at the image as I would look at a text, and let myself be drawn to a particular aspect of it, allowing what resonated to speak to me its message. I looked at different parts of the picture slowly and found myself drawn to the green, light grasses sprouting from the tightest of spaces. I thought about how God’s grace and life are somehow able to find a way to express itself through my life in spite of all my weakness and imperfections, and my inattentiveness to him. God’s life finds a way somehow. And I am most grateful for such expressions of his life through mine.

I was such a shy, reserved and insecure teenager when the Lord rescued me. He put his life in me when I repented and believed in Jesus Christ. How that seed, that life found a way to express itself through me in the tightest of spaces is amazing. I cannot even speak and am socially awkward and yet I was slowly transformed into a speaker, a teacher of God’s ways, able to share his word with audiences big or small. He has also transformed me and made me more socially confident and able to easily relate to and befriend others. 

God’s life always finds a way – even with the imperfect, limited material he has to work with. God’s life in us finds a way to express itself through us. Even if the space is tight and limited and not ideal. We saints are cracked pottery and have lots of imperfections. We are also ordinary clay jars not expensive rare ceramic or jade. However, we hold or contain a priceless amazing treasure, the Spirit of Jesus, a gift from the Father above (2 Cor 4:7). He is God’s seed, life, power and presence in us. He works in us to refine and fill our character with more of Christ. He empowers us with spiritual gifts and enablements that enhances what we already possess by nature or nurture, or where none was present at all. These graces and gifts are the expressions of his life through our ordinary life. It is expressed through us for God’s glory and for the benefit and blessing of others with whom we share these gifts and graces. We certainly ought to thank God for these expressions of life, however little or flimsy they may seem. Stop berating ourself but learn to give glory to God for all the little steps forward and the progress made thus far. Then we shall see even more of his life expressed through us.

How has God’s life found expressions in your life? Feel free to give glory to God by sharing with us in the comment box. 

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Oh To Be Like A Dove

With ease the dove nestles in the gap that she calls home. Home is simple, bare yet solid. Sometimes the rain flushes the floor clean. However, life has its headaches. The jarring screech that vibrates the home throughout the day ceases only after midnight, and then restarts at dawn. She gets used to it. Not her ideal home but it will have to do. She feels content with her current life circumstances.

Here she finds rest and safety. 

She enjoys unblocked views of the Chinese Gardens. On Sundays, she loves watching the foreign workers playing a game of cricket in the vast green before her.

Though she lives from beak to stomach there is no lack.

Anytime, she is free to take flight into God’s vast world and feel the joy of fulfilling all that God has designed her to be and to do. She feels close to God when she uses all the gifts that God has given her: feathers and wings, lightness of body, natural navigation system, sight, and sensitivity to airflow and predators.

God has graced her with peace, goodness and abundance. 

Like the dove, I am thankful that God has put me in a place of grace and peace, of freedom and sweetness, of contentment and fulfilment. The Lord is more than enough. The vista ahead is exciting. The simple life is simply life-giving and life-freeing.

“Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me. I said, “Oh, that I had the wings of a dove I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm” (Psalm 45:5-8).

“Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you have died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God” (Col 3:2,3).

Selah.

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